So before I go into my new blog post, I need to add a couple of details to my last one. Remember when the Nun & I were talking about "yobs"? Well I played this game with them where I wrote on the board "Victoria is a vet. Brian is a basketball player. Tom is a...?" And they had to give me jobs starting with the person's name. At first it was a bit of a shit show with the kids constantly yelling the 8 vocabulary words in the book..."teacher!!! doctor!!! dentist!!!! footballer!!! vet!!!!" ......noooo, think outside of the box. So I wrote a list of popular careers beforehand and made them push themselves. By the end, they kept begging for more people. One girl kept saying "hair dresser!" without understanding the game, so I threw her one. I wrote "Harold is a...?" thinking there was only one answer. I kept waiting and waiting for her to give her answer (she'd thrown it out about 50 times before...) and nothing. Nobody could think of anything either, until one girl raised her hand and shouted "husband!".......................HAH. I literally rolled my eyes at her and tried to explain that a job has to earn you money as well as be a pain in the butt. They laughed. I think they understood the joke. Even better was in a different class when I wrote "Chelsea is a...?" and they all said "Teacher!!!" .....okay guys, follow the rules. That's what I get for being so selfish, haha. So I changed to "Carol is a...?" and none of them could think of comedian or construction worker. They all were literally reading their dictionaries trying to come across any word that could be a job. One girl walked up and she said "Ca-ho-leek?" I looked at her severely confused, thinking...car leak? Mechanic? Frustrated, she switched to Spanish and said, "no!! Catholic!!" .......baahahahaha. Once more, not a profession. Lifestyle, maybe...but...no. Hilarious.
Maybe this won't be a short post after all...but hey look I'm posting more regularly!! *Knock on wood* Anyways this week is going to be a long, long week. Last week seemed pretty short, because life seemed to get back to normal after Steph left, AND it was "Cultural Week" so there were a lot of activities to break up all of my classes. One of those activities was a "tombola"...which, basically, was a carnival with a raffle. Starting at 11 a.m., all of the classes were let out and there was a full out carnival all throughout the school. The week before, the older students had asked different grade levels to bring in different food or toys....such as Nutella, bread, toys (brand new or lightly used), jewelry, snacks...etc. I figured they were going to have a huge toy drive or donation or something at the end because I've (sort of recently) learned that my school is not only a Catholic school, but built into a huge convent. And this convent is part of a chain of convents, if you will, founded by the same nun dude a long long time ago. So....that's why the metro stop by my school is called "Churches", basically. Because there's a bajillion churches and convents around. My convent/school/nuns even have their own food bank where homeless and hungry people come in the morning and line up for blocks to get (really good smelling) food in the morning. I like to think of my nuns as a Walmart or SuperTarget of nuns. They've got it all!
Not that I have anything to do with that but it makes me feel proud. All the nuns (except for Colonel Nun) are like abrasive grandmothers who kiss you and bless you a lot. And then I'm sweet because they think I can't speak Spanish. Probably better that way.
Anyways...the Tombola. I got to school feeling really ill on Thursday (I developed self-diagnosed bronchitis last week and the medicine I found made me queasy) and I kept fighting a high fever for days. I was really upset to be sick on this epic day, though, so I went to class and tried to fight it out. My kids don't really know the definition of sick though. Last week one of my students was astounded to see me in class. He ran up to me and said "I thought you weren't going to be here!! My sister said you were sick yesterday!" I looked at him funny and asked why she thought I was sick? He said, "well she told me you wear contacts...I thought you weren't going to come in!" I guess contacts aren't big here...and most people wear glasses...(I didn't notice)...because the nun yelled at him and told him "SUT UP, don't esay teengs like dis. Ess berry rude." I looked at the kid and I said "yes...I wear contacts! But that doesn't mean I'm sick!" and ALL of my students gasped like I had the Bubonic Plague. And then immediately rushed up to stare in my eyeballs to try to see the little blue line of my contacts.
...and I wonder how I get so damned sick and so often.
Don't even get me started on that. I know how. Exactly how. Besides the little nose-pickers who are also the most inclined to hug me (Murphy's law), there is also this innate ability in children to come up with the absolute dumbest ideas. Let me just tell you a little side story. Last week in class I was trying to teach 2nd grade (which please keep in mind, I HATE. All of them are little devils. Seriously. Awful) and they kept playing with their tape or something and making their pencils stick to their hands. And they act like I can't totally see them doing this. I walked over to the Head Brat's desk and said "MIGUEL. Put the tape away. NOW." Blank stare. Of course, their first go to when I yell. "But I don't understand English!!" *puppy face* ....yeah right. You're to evil to be so innocent all of a sudden. I said "Celo. Tape? Put it away"....and he whined about not using tape and he didn't do anything, blah blah blah. Fine, whatever. Just put your pencil away. Two seconds later he's picking something else up, like his eraser or something and acting like he can do a magic trick because look, it's sticking to his hand!! First of all, I'm not impressed. Second of all, I said put the tape away. He said he still didn't have any tape so I took his pencil. And his eraser. And told him to stare at the book. Soon enough six other kids are doing this unimpressive magic trick so I get frustrated and yell at all of them that I said no tape!! And they say they have no tape. Of course. Stupid little liars! They think they're smarter than me. Right. So anyways I assign some homework and keep a coy eye on the little suckers just waiting to see a tape dispenser come out of the woodwork.
What they were doing was.....ugh. Disgusting.
Finally one took the bait and said, "Hey, watch this!!" He took his hands, cupped them together, and then spit into his palms. Rubbed his hands together, and then was able to press hard enough to his pencil that the thin layer of saliva made shit stick to his hands. And by that point about ten other students were doing the same thing. I could literally hear all of them spitting in their hands and rubbing them together. Including this impulsive kid who always insists on giving him numerous high-fives. Gross. Absolutely....gross. I'm not touching those little worms again. Inventive? Yes. Does it make me want to vom? Oh hell yes.
So....anyways the mystery of my sickness is pretty much solved. But I endured anyways so I could go to the carnival. They had hot dogs for sale, cokes, pastries, snacks, and a crap ton of jewelry, scarves, clothes, books, and toys for sale....they had literally taken the donations from the kids and were selling them at this carnival!! I'm assuming they were going to eventually donate the money, but...I'm just not quite sure that was the right way to go about it?! I mean....right?! Donate all of that stuff!! I don't think second-hand places are as popular here but they pretty much set up their own Goodwill for the kids and all of the kids had brought like 20 euros to school to spend on junk food and crap like this. They also had face painting, a haunted house, a dance/talent competition, and other games. The BEST idea they had were penalty kicks. They roped off one of the soccer goals to indicate point values based on where you hit the goal (if any) and charged 40 cents per kick. Now that seems legit to me, to make a profit...not selling donations. My 6th grade students were waiting in line for the Haunted House (which was slightly scary, I'm guessing, because all of my little 1st graders kept going in and coming out bawling...like hysterics...) and I wasn't going to go, but they bought me a ticket. So I waited in line with them for awhile, probably like 45 minutes, and gave the boys "tattoos" with a Sharpie I had in my pocket (they were thrilled, free tattooes!!) I really didn't want to go in the haunted house (tis not the season) but luckily by the time I got to the door, one of the girls had lost her ticket so I gave her mine and she was able to go in. One of my students bought me a hot dog (and put mustard on it...yuck) which was super cute. It's the one who has the crush on me apparently. I was trying to figure out how to eat the hot dog (not exactly the most manageable food) and he goes "Chelsea, you'd better like that hot dog!!! I stood in line for 45 minutes waiting for it!!" ....hahaha. Sad but very true fact. Anyways, while we were waiting in line I took a little video of the insanity:
I grabbed Juliet, because she was feeling sick too, and was suddenly inspired to show off my soccer skills over at the penalty shots. First of all, the range was very close so I knew I couldn't dick it up that badly. Secondly, it was all of my older male students that were creating the long ass line, so I knew I could cut and get in quickly. We bought 3 tickets to shoot (because Juliet wanted to try too) and before I went over I grabbed all of my students I could to come watch me. She thought that was a bad idea, asking "um...are you sure you want to do that? What if you suck?" Good thing I've got a big ego and skill to back it up! Luckily Juliet chickened out before we got over there (probably due to the assanine amount of my students surrounding me, and the fact that her kids were the ones running the booth) so I got all three kicks to myself.
I think this was my favorite moment of my life thus far.
So I had gathered all my kids. Plus when I asked the boys if I could cut, they all agreed (laughing at me thinking I would suck) and managed to tell all of their other little brat friends to come watch me bite it. I didn't exactly take into account that the goal was super close to a window....the window has wrought iron bars around it, but never the less...windows. Very close. Right behind the goal that does not have a net. So I have to push my kids back so I can get a running start. Doing so creates a little tunnel of my students, and they all start cheering for me. "CHELSEA!! CHELSEA!!! CHELSEA!!!" I kick the first one, and it pounds right into the 8 point hole (next to one of the top corners, worth the highest points, 10) and subsequentially that window I forgot was behind it. Luckily it bounced off of the iron bars but the speed/force was a bit more than they were anticipating, by far. They all go NUTS, because they had no idea I used to play soccer. This gathers more people, plus the fact that all of them are screaming "Chelsea" at the top of their lungs and everyone is wondering what the hell is going on. By the 2nd kick, this entire half of the playground was filled with my students. After discussing with my boys, who are now flabbergasted and in total shock, I decide to go for a corner. I kick it, to twice as much screaming as before "CHELSEA....CHELSEA....CHELSEA!!!" and the damn thing hits the cross bar in the corner, missed by about an inch. However, it hit the bar so hard that it made quite a noise which amped up the guys even more...plus the fact that it almost hit one of them in the face on the rebound. For the third one, it was quite like the first one which even more cheering and it went in an 8 point hole I think. It was the most exciting moment of my life. I felt like such a BADASS. And now all of my students think I am the epitome of cool. They're still talking about it and apparently I came in 2nd in the penalty contest. I guess they were averaging the scores of people and I came in 2nd. HAH. Incredible!!
All of a sudden I felt unbelievably better. Fame, even at such a minute level, feels sooo good.
Monday, March 28, 2011
Friday, March 25, 2011
This blogpost is rated IA: for immature audiences only.
While I am writing this I am drinking a "smoothie"....I will never order American-based food here ever again. I should have known I was in trouble when the girl asked if I wanted "all milk"...I was like um, as opposed to...? "Half milk, half water?" Right. All milk, please...
Poor decision. It tastes like half and half mixed with strawberry syrup for sundaes...and I think that's what it is, in all actuality. At one point it had ice but she blended it for 5 minutes on "puree", so...no more ice. Just foam. I literally feel like I'm directly sucking from the teat of a strawberry-ish cow. Ugh.
This week, in 4th grade, we've been discussing the topic of "What do you want to be?" with the nun...and the kids are learning job vocabulary (footballer [i.e. soccer player], nurse, doctor [cause we're sexist here...], vet [pronounced "bet"], singer, etc.). They always ask me, "Chelsea, do you want to be a teacher?" and at first I panic, because I feel like yes should be the obvious answer. And saying, "well it's my fall-back option, or Plan B" might seem a bit...you know, discouraging. But, when confronted with such things, and I feel guilty, I can't lie, so I tell them I want to be a translator. At first they're super impressed, but then become taken aback and think I'm a bit stupid to become a translator when I only speak English. I guess it would be pretty dumb to become a translator when I "don't speak any Spanish". Oh well. We crossed this bridge back when they asked me what my favorite subject was and I said "Spanish...uh, Spanish....English."
Everyone's always asking me if I want to be a teacher soon (after Spain) and quite honestly I don't think I'm mature enough. I giggle when my kids accidentally say bad words and I would rather they love me than be an authority figure. And again, I'm super immature.
For example, one of my kids came up to me today and said, "Chelsea!! Fernando said girls are stupid!"...my only response that I could think of was "well that makes Fernando stupid for thinking that." She nodded and walked off. I'm almost 82% sure that wasn't how to properly handle the situation...
Another example: at recess one day, one of my 1st graders came up indignant, pulled my shirt and said, "CHELSEA. Do you know what Marta called me?!" I thought....oh no. Please oh please do not make me have to explain something awkward, something sexual, something vulgar...like calling him names of body parts or things to do with processes of body parts...but he was SUPER upset so I was worried it'd be worse than that...and from innocent little Marta? I love Marta! Every day for 2 weeks Marta came up to me and showed me how she could bite her lip like a bulldog and blow hard enough to make one of her teeth wiggle back and forth. [Honestly I have NO idea how that tooth stayed put for 2 weeks...she could have started a small gypsy show in the metro for spare change] Little Marta?! I don't want to have to lay down the law with poor Marta...
"Chelsea!! She called me....A BEAST!"
....really? That's it? That's half of a Disney movie title, for crying out loud. Laughing in Daniel's face was probably also not the adequate response, I bet. But I gave him a hug and a pat on the head and told him if that's the worst he was called that day, he was lucky. I'm sure he felt better.
Going back to the "what do you want to be..." topic, Colonel Nun took this opportunity to laugh in every child's face who said "I want to be a teacher". Not to mention when she was explaining "jobs" she said, "Jew know, yobs. A yob!! My BABIES, yobs! What ees a yob? Jew know, a yob, a way to earn moneey in so-shitty".
*Pause*....so-shitty? Emphasis on so. SO-shitty. What the hell is.....ah. Use your context. Society. Nun-ism. *Unpause*
"HAH!! Jew want to be a teach-ah? [British accent...teach-ah.] Madre mia, madre mia!! HAHA! Jew want to be a teach-ah...when I was eleetle and I tought 'I want to be a teach-ah' too....HAH! My Gode, I was an eedee-ot!! Come now, babies...be ca-ful."
Rumor has it she wants to quit teaching and only be a resource teacher//tutor. I think I definitely believe that now...haha.
As loyal blog followers, I'm sure you'd all love to hear how my 5th grade students did on their Animal vocabulary tests. About 7 kids in each class (out of 22 kids) passed. In Spain, a 5 (or 50%) is passing. That means that about 3 got above a 70% (a C), and the other 4 got about a 5, or a 5.5 (50-55%). The rest scored below that. As a bit of educational commentary, it is completely acceptable to barely pass here. Rocio, my teacher, was told she was not allowed to "fail so many kids"...but it's vocabulary...they just don't want to study. Aggravating!!! I spent my entire Saturday two weeks ago making this presentation for the kids so they could be excited and learn. Nope. Wasted. Oh well. I'm in Spain. That's how it goes. To lighten the mood, here are a few colorful answers given on the test [they were given the word in Spanish, and had to write it in English]:
Oveja (sheep): beer
Ballena (whale): balls
Colibri (hummingbird): spazzo
...for the record, if I was the one grading the exams, I would have given each of these answers 1/2 a point for making me laugh so damned hard. Once again, another testament to more reasons I shouldn't become a legit teacher.
Poor decision. It tastes like half and half mixed with strawberry syrup for sundaes...and I think that's what it is, in all actuality. At one point it had ice but she blended it for 5 minutes on "puree", so...no more ice. Just foam. I literally feel like I'm directly sucking from the teat of a strawberry-ish cow. Ugh.
This week, in 4th grade, we've been discussing the topic of "What do you want to be?" with the nun...and the kids are learning job vocabulary (footballer [i.e. soccer player], nurse, doctor [cause we're sexist here...], vet [pronounced "bet"], singer, etc.). They always ask me, "Chelsea, do you want to be a teacher?" and at first I panic, because I feel like yes should be the obvious answer. And saying, "well it's my fall-back option, or Plan B" might seem a bit...you know, discouraging. But, when confronted with such things, and I feel guilty, I can't lie, so I tell them I want to be a translator. At first they're super impressed, but then become taken aback and think I'm a bit stupid to become a translator when I only speak English. I guess it would be pretty dumb to become a translator when I "don't speak any Spanish". Oh well. We crossed this bridge back when they asked me what my favorite subject was and I said "Spanish...uh, Spanish....English."
Everyone's always asking me if I want to be a teacher soon (after Spain) and quite honestly I don't think I'm mature enough. I giggle when my kids accidentally say bad words and I would rather they love me than be an authority figure. And again, I'm super immature.
For example, one of my kids came up to me today and said, "Chelsea!! Fernando said girls are stupid!"...my only response that I could think of was "well that makes Fernando stupid for thinking that." She nodded and walked off. I'm almost 82% sure that wasn't how to properly handle the situation...
Another example: at recess one day, one of my 1st graders came up indignant, pulled my shirt and said, "CHELSEA. Do you know what Marta called me?!" I thought....oh no. Please oh please do not make me have to explain something awkward, something sexual, something vulgar...like calling him names of body parts or things to do with processes of body parts...but he was SUPER upset so I was worried it'd be worse than that...and from innocent little Marta? I love Marta! Every day for 2 weeks Marta came up to me and showed me how she could bite her lip like a bulldog and blow hard enough to make one of her teeth wiggle back and forth. [Honestly I have NO idea how that tooth stayed put for 2 weeks...she could have started a small gypsy show in the metro for spare change] Little Marta?! I don't want to have to lay down the law with poor Marta...
"Chelsea!! She called me....A BEAST!"
....really? That's it? That's half of a Disney movie title, for crying out loud. Laughing in Daniel's face was probably also not the adequate response, I bet. But I gave him a hug and a pat on the head and told him if that's the worst he was called that day, he was lucky. I'm sure he felt better.
Going back to the "what do you want to be..." topic, Colonel Nun took this opportunity to laugh in every child's face who said "I want to be a teacher". Not to mention when she was explaining "jobs" she said, "Jew know, yobs. A yob!! My BABIES, yobs! What ees a yob? Jew know, a yob, a way to earn moneey in so-shitty".
*Pause*....so-shitty? Emphasis on so. SO-shitty. What the hell is.....ah. Use your context. Society. Nun-ism. *Unpause*
"HAH!! Jew want to be a teach-ah? [British accent...teach-ah.] Madre mia, madre mia!! HAHA! Jew want to be a teach-ah...when I was eleetle and I tought 'I want to be a teach-ah' too....HAH! My Gode, I was an eedee-ot!! Come now, babies...be ca-ful."
Rumor has it she wants to quit teaching and only be a resource teacher//tutor. I think I definitely believe that now...haha.
As loyal blog followers, I'm sure you'd all love to hear how my 5th grade students did on their Animal vocabulary tests. About 7 kids in each class (out of 22 kids) passed. In Spain, a 5 (or 50%) is passing. That means that about 3 got above a 70% (a C), and the other 4 got about a 5, or a 5.5 (50-55%). The rest scored below that. As a bit of educational commentary, it is completely acceptable to barely pass here. Rocio, my teacher, was told she was not allowed to "fail so many kids"...but it's vocabulary...they just don't want to study. Aggravating!!! I spent my entire Saturday two weeks ago making this presentation for the kids so they could be excited and learn. Nope. Wasted. Oh well. I'm in Spain. That's how it goes. To lighten the mood, here are a few colorful answers given on the test [they were given the word in Spanish, and had to write it in English]:
Oveja (sheep): beer
Ballena (whale): balls
Colibri (hummingbird): spazzo
...for the record, if I was the one grading the exams, I would have given each of these answers 1/2 a point for making me laugh so damned hard. Once again, another testament to more reasons I shouldn't become a legit teacher.
Thursday, March 24, 2011
Oh yeah, baby!!
Hello and I'm sorry!, first and foremost. I haven't been great about updating this because last week was finals week, plus one of my best friends, Stephanie, came to visit. It was in the same week, so I tried to boost into super mode to get all of my shit done before she got here. That was unsuccessful (surprising? no), but I've finally burned out and become sick from being so pushed to the limit....so my body is forcing me to take a break and rest. Thanks, body.
Sigh...where to begin!? Stephanie told me my blogs are too long so I'm going to try to write less...more often. (That's aiming a bit high but it's the thought that counts)
Hm, okay. So recently pop culture has been ruling my school and students. Usually it's just a little reference to soccer, or my students ask me if I watch Teen Mom (...and get super impressed when I tell them that crazy psycho Amber is from Indiana...please keep in mind my students are 12, at best). Whatever. It's gotten significantly worse though...and I'm never ready for it.
Fore example, I was teaching my first graders how to play Go Fish...to practice numbers. I thought that would be super fun and easy but I was so wrong. First of all, they didn't get the RULES of the game. I told them all beforehand but they must not have understood or paid attention. To begin with, they didn't understand that you had to give all of the cards they had of one number if somebody asked for them. THEN they didn't put two and two together and understand that they couldn't ask for cards that they didn't have in their hand. It was a small nightmare. They actually couldn't even manage "go fish"...they always said "ess feesh." And yet they still managed "have you got...three?" They're so freaking adorable so it doesn't even matter. Anyways, one of the kids was really smart, though, and understood how to play the game. He said "I saw dis on TV, because I watch TV een Eengleesh!" Good for you, Luca. Half way through the game when he got one pair, he yelled "OH YEAH, BABY, YEAH!!!"
.....................................................................errrr, Luca, what TV do you watch in English!? Austin Powers?! I had no idea what to even say so I just ignored him and tried to tell the other kids he didn't know what he was talking about. That's the last thing I need....80 little international men of mystery running around my school.
In 5th grade, they're learning about animals. They had about 80 vocabulary words of different animals, and some of them they didn't even know in Spanish. For example, otter is nutria. They ask, "what is otter?" I tell them "nutria"..................................."Chelsea, what is nutria?" Lord. So I put pictures with the names and we had been practicing the pronunciation. P.S. my FAVORITE animal for them to say is squirrel. Hands down. They say it like "skwee-rull"...but fast! It sounds so hilarious. We practiced it about fifty times in each class...for pronunciation, but mainly because it was so funny to me. I really don't want them to say it right. Anyways, last Friday class was over, and Rocio and I were leaving saying "Bye!! Have a good weekend!!" ...dead silence. Rocio (the teacher), said "wow, how rude...I said "have a good weekend!!"....??" Still, silence. So she explained (keep in mind we've been doing this with this class since September, and they still have no idea) what "have a good weekend" means in Spanish, and the proper response is "you too!". So all the kids shouted "you too!!.......YouTube!!" Except it was more like this:
Kids: Jew too!...haha, JewToob!! JewToob! Ees like JewToob!!
...someday I'm going to dedicate an entire class to teaching my students how to pronounce "y". Until then, I'm going to keep chuckling at their unfortunate mishaps.
During the same animal presentation, the kids learned the word "chicken"...they already knew it but they were having fun putting a picture with the word. One of the kids, when we reached the slide, yelled "Chee-kun! Like Chee-kun tenders!" I was like.....um, Jorge, where did you learn the phrase "chicken tenders"?? He matter-of-factly replies "Boo-rger Keeng". Great. Then we were looking at "cat", which they all knew, but I thought it'd be funny to put a picture of my brother with my cat, Lexi...because she looks NOTHING like the cats they have here. This is the picture I put on the slide:
Wonderful, right? Anyways I thought they'd just think it was hilarious...and none of my students thought he was my brother...until I told them, and then they got SUPER excited. But the one class, the infamous class (that by the way, is usually my favorite) thought he was Fernando Torres, a famous soccer player who used to play for one of the Madrid teams. This is him:
I think it's one of those things where they just love this guy so much they really hoped it was him. Anyways I showed them the picture of Lexi and Alex and this is the conversation that was had:
Me: Cat! Do you know who this is?
Kids: OH MY GODE (that's how they say "oh my God"), ees Fernando Torres!!!
Me: No....it's not Fernando Torres, it's my brother!
Kids: YOUR BROTHER IS FERNANDO TORRES!?
Me: nooooooo....my brother is Alex, and this is my cat Lexi!
Kids: So wait...is that why Torres now plays for Chelsea??? THAT IS SO COOL.
..........fail. Big fail. Chelsea is one of the competing soccer teams, and a main reason why I LOVE living in Spain. It's a great way to explain how to pronounce my name (Chelsea...like the soccer team? Yes :) AND most guys here adore soccer so they think it's really exciting. Double bonus!! So anyways....my students STILL think that guy's my brother and think he switched from Madrid to Chelsea for that reason (because he now plays for Chelsea). Great. Hey, I'll take it.
This is my attempt at being "short"....eh. Tomorrow during lunch I'll update a little bit more...I have an entire list of crazy to report :) GO BULLDOGS!!!
Sigh...where to begin!? Stephanie told me my blogs are too long so I'm going to try to write less...more often. (That's aiming a bit high but it's the thought that counts)
Hm, okay. So recently pop culture has been ruling my school and students. Usually it's just a little reference to soccer, or my students ask me if I watch Teen Mom (...and get super impressed when I tell them that crazy psycho Amber is from Indiana...please keep in mind my students are 12, at best). Whatever. It's gotten significantly worse though...and I'm never ready for it.
Fore example, I was teaching my first graders how to play Go Fish...to practice numbers. I thought that would be super fun and easy but I was so wrong. First of all, they didn't get the RULES of the game. I told them all beforehand but they must not have understood or paid attention. To begin with, they didn't understand that you had to give all of the cards they had of one number if somebody asked for them. THEN they didn't put two and two together and understand that they couldn't ask for cards that they didn't have in their hand. It was a small nightmare. They actually couldn't even manage "go fish"...they always said "ess feesh." And yet they still managed "have you got...three?" They're so freaking adorable so it doesn't even matter. Anyways, one of the kids was really smart, though, and understood how to play the game. He said "I saw dis on TV, because I watch TV een Eengleesh!" Good for you, Luca. Half way through the game when he got one pair, he yelled "OH YEAH, BABY, YEAH!!!"
.....................................................................errrr, Luca, what TV do you watch in English!? Austin Powers?! I had no idea what to even say so I just ignored him and tried to tell the other kids he didn't know what he was talking about. That's the last thing I need....80 little international men of mystery running around my school.
In 5th grade, they're learning about animals. They had about 80 vocabulary words of different animals, and some of them they didn't even know in Spanish. For example, otter is nutria. They ask, "what is otter?" I tell them "nutria"..................................."Chelsea, what is nutria?" Lord. So I put pictures with the names and we had been practicing the pronunciation. P.S. my FAVORITE animal for them to say is squirrel. Hands down. They say it like "skwee-rull"...but fast! It sounds so hilarious. We practiced it about fifty times in each class...for pronunciation, but mainly because it was so funny to me. I really don't want them to say it right. Anyways, last Friday class was over, and Rocio and I were leaving saying "Bye!! Have a good weekend!!" ...dead silence. Rocio (the teacher), said "wow, how rude...I said "have a good weekend!!"....??" Still, silence. So she explained (keep in mind we've been doing this with this class since September, and they still have no idea) what "have a good weekend" means in Spanish, and the proper response is "you too!". So all the kids shouted "you too!!.......YouTube!!" Except it was more like this:
Kids: Jew too!...haha, JewToob!! JewToob! Ees like JewToob!!
...someday I'm going to dedicate an entire class to teaching my students how to pronounce "y". Until then, I'm going to keep chuckling at their unfortunate mishaps.
During the same animal presentation, the kids learned the word "chicken"...they already knew it but they were having fun putting a picture with the word. One of the kids, when we reached the slide, yelled "Chee-kun! Like Chee-kun tenders!" I was like.....um, Jorge, where did you learn the phrase "chicken tenders"?? He matter-of-factly replies "Boo-rger Keeng". Great. Then we were looking at "cat", which they all knew, but I thought it'd be funny to put a picture of my brother with my cat, Lexi...because she looks NOTHING like the cats they have here. This is the picture I put on the slide:
Wonderful, right? Anyways I thought they'd just think it was hilarious...and none of my students thought he was my brother...until I told them, and then they got SUPER excited. But the one class, the infamous class (that by the way, is usually my favorite) thought he was Fernando Torres, a famous soccer player who used to play for one of the Madrid teams. This is him:
I think it's one of those things where they just love this guy so much they really hoped it was him. Anyways I showed them the picture of Lexi and Alex and this is the conversation that was had:
Me: Cat! Do you know who this is?
Kids: OH MY GODE (that's how they say "oh my God"), ees Fernando Torres!!!
Me: No....it's not Fernando Torres, it's my brother!
Kids: YOUR BROTHER IS FERNANDO TORRES!?
Me: nooooooo....my brother is Alex, and this is my cat Lexi!
Kids: So wait...is that why Torres now plays for Chelsea??? THAT IS SO COOL.
..........fail. Big fail. Chelsea is one of the competing soccer teams, and a main reason why I LOVE living in Spain. It's a great way to explain how to pronounce my name (Chelsea...like the soccer team? Yes :) AND most guys here adore soccer so they think it's really exciting. Double bonus!! So anyways....my students STILL think that guy's my brother and think he switched from Madrid to Chelsea for that reason (because he now plays for Chelsea). Great. Hey, I'll take it.
This is my attempt at being "short"....eh. Tomorrow during lunch I'll update a little bit more...I have an entire list of crazy to report :) GO BULLDOGS!!!
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